Offerings Through Tears

The way I call to and communicate with my ancestors, to the deceased, involves very few steps, though it is energy-draining for me so I don’t tend to do it very often. I usually light a candle, get into a light trance state, whisper the names of the dead I wish to honor or speak with, and then after a little while come the tears. I find it interesting that my tears and sobs seem to act as both an offering (a way to feed the spirit, give it energy and essence with which they use to communicate with me) and as a release for them, a way for them to let go of any angst or hold they have on this realm. It is incredibly powerful, and I find it fascinating work. The way it feels is the most important component, I think. I do not enter into this work from a place of sadness, usually. I am usually very matter-of-fact about the process, and when the tears come, it’s then I know the spirit has come. I am flooded with memories, their memories, often from long ago that do not belong to me, or memories that include me but have been forgotten, and then I am flooded with emotions. Usually because they are my relatives, I am flooded with the love they feel for me and those they left behind, and with regret at their inability to be here with us or for something that they need to release, some personal issue they weren’t able to let go of before they died. It is unlike our sorrow, for they seem to have their own new types of business to take care of, but they do still miss us and it seems that they do hang on and wait for us in some kind of way. It usually seems much easier to communicate with the deceased than with the living because, firstly, I just feel what I feel or think what I think and they can feel and think back. But it is more than that. It is because, through death, they have let go of their ego self, they are able to handle more forthright communication. For instance, I’ve been able to express things to my mother-in-law, who is very easy to call in, that I would not have been able to express to her while she was alive. Like the anger I felt at things that had happened or were said, frustration with the way she handled something, etc. Because she no longer has a human body with a human ego, she is (as I understand it) pure energy and a shade (or what I believe is a piece of a triple-layered soul), she was able to accept my anger, and it seems we both were able to let it go in love and forgiveness. I was also able to cry out some sorrows she was hanging tightly onto regarding her kids, my husband and in-laws. I knew that this was not my grief, it was a mother’s grief. Since I am not a mother, this was a very different perspective for me, and I felt it an honor to be able to let her use my body to leave her grief and regret for them here, leave it behind so that she is free to move on. This is why I think this type of work is necessary and worthwhile for healing of ourselves, and thus, on the path to a higher state of enlightenment. Our familial lineage is tied in knots when we can’t let go or forgive things, souls that have unfinished business can’t move on or are stunted in their own evolution. It is to all of our benefit, and to the benefit of those yet to be born, that we heal this grief. My seidr mentor does a lot of this kind of work and she calls it Inherited Cultural Grief. I personally believe that any human being on the planet can contact the dead, if they learn how to get into the right state of mind, and be able to handle what comes. But that is the real trick: I do not think most people these days can handle these things in an impersonal, pragmatic manner. I think it’s rather important that even though we may call on our own relatives that we remain very…impartial. It is difficult to reach this point, I think, because we are so wrapped up in our current selves and lives, most people today are unable to separate themselves from their egos, and may not be able to even identify it at all and therefore cannot understand when they need to set it aside. The ego is a necessary thing for us, but it is possible to understand it as a piece, a layer, within our psyche’s that can be put on hold for awhile. It takes commitment and understanding in order to reach a level of understanding within even ourselves. I’m not sure that most modern people are taught or have an interest in this kind of work, which is unfortunate because I consider it some of the most important work in which a person can engage. Not just talking to the dead, but exploring the great mysteries of the soul, the earth, the cosmos and beyond. The way to explore these things is to learn to find them within us. I know that all sounds very woo-woo and new-agey, but it’s true. The keys to all doors exist within us, and this is why I find the psyche so very fascinating. Sometimes it is as simple as asking your psyche to show you the way, and it will reveal it. That said, these things are clues. And lessons. If you keep finding yourself in the same situations, with the same problems, the same bad luck, it is a sign that you are not learning the lessons you’re being taught! Time to mind your teachers 🙂


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