(I started this post in mid-April…)
Ehwaz is one of the runes that keeps showing up in my rune pulls. It signifies great changes. It isn’t kidding 🙂
So much has happened since I last posted. Much has built up to this point, and I am now a student of Seiðr, an ancient form of Norse journeying and sorcery. Since starting with this training, I find it very difficult to be fully present in the mundane world. I feel very split at this point, which my mentor says is common before one can fully integrate the Seen with the Unseen. It is rather strange because while I’m still not fully perceiving the Web of Wyrd, things are starting to shift. I’m much more contemplative now, having less to say, noticing more of my surroundings and how they are subtly different than before. I take special notice these days of the pulse around me that I sense around trees, budding flowers, sunlight, shadows, the sounds around me. I only sometimes listen to music while walking now, as I’d rather listen to nature as she speaks to me. I sing or hum to the river and trees and sky, I’ve performed seiðr on my walks and breaks, which has been very profound, being able to journey out of doors. I had an incredible experience with what I understood to be the entity Freyja that I had to stop prematurely, it was so intense and wonderful, but I knew that her power could obliterate me. Since starting with seiðr and staving (a method my teacher taught me where you use a staff (stav) and tein (smaller stick) to create rhythms that along with seiðr-style vocalizations bring you to the different realms), I’ve had more success in shamanic journeying than with any other method. I seem to be starting to feel these fine connections within the Web, and it is strange and amazing. I could have a post for each of my journeys, and of course, I write them all down in my hand written journal. My dreams have been incredibly instructive and initiatory in nature. I’ve had encounters in dreams and in journeying with Þórr, Óðinn, and Freyja. I’ve also encountered many mythical eagles, one that I think was Hræsvelgr, whose name means “Corpse Swallower” and is a very complicated and interesting character, though probably the one humans should fear the most. I am trying to connect (and think I finally have) with my fylgia (life-tracker or guardian) and hamr (the part of the soul that shape-shifts and travels the worlds for you), and I’ve had very interesting results with a meditation my teacher taught me on finding my own Hugin & Munin (Thought and Memory). These have been the most trans-formative experiences and have helped me really try to grasp the very nature of the soul and the deep Mysteries.
I finally finished Maria Kvilhaug’s important book, “The Seed of Yggdrasill” and I feel closer than ever to really understanding what the Norse myths intended to convey. They are extremely complex. I am going to re-read it and perhaps try to journey into the myths themselves. This is a way of journeying that I’ve not been successful with, or at least, not that I am conscious of, and is sometimes called pathworking, wherein you can enter the world of a myth, a landscape, a rune, a tarot card, etc. It is a way of understanding the nature of a symbol or story that you really just can’t get from reading about it, you get it by true experience. The trick to pathworking, of course, is to get into the proper trance state, and while I’m sure I’ve done it, I just haven’t remained conscious enough to write down or recall my travels! The mind is a mysterious world full of shadows. It can be hard to see in the dark, until one learns to open the right set of eyes.
U2: I Will Follow
“I was looking at myself, I was blind, I could not see”